My journey into leather land has been a gradual exploration of new ideas, relationships, and identities. The L.C. is a place that encourages experimentation and pushing your boundaries with the goal of experiencing new pleasures and unlocking deeper parts of yourself. To me the community of kinky folk is like an incubator that nurtures and matures you so you emerge with a stronger sense of self and a more enlightened view of sexuality and fulfillment. It’s also just a lot of fun along the way 🙂
There are numerous roles one can pursue–Dom, Sub, Daddy, Sir, puppy, Master, slave, etc.–and the one I’ve naturally gravitated towards is that of “boy” in the context of a “Daddy/boy” relationship dynamic. This is an identity that has been on the fringes of my self for years, but I didn’t fully realize it or know how to explore it until I entered into Leather and found a social framework already in place and ready to go.
There must be a laundry list of reasons men want to be boys with each individual having his own unique set of ideas. Boys come in all shapes/sizes/ages/mentalities/flavors and all have a special submissive side they want to share with their Sir or Daddy. I know for me that sub side is a place of wonderful freedom and security where instead of being powerless–as some may assume–I’m actually very much empowered because I’ve recognized my worth and put myself into the hands of Daddy who’s someone I’ve chosen as worthy of that honor. The exchange of power is deeply intimate and carries with it great potential for pleasure and growth. As a boy I’ve gained more confidence and strength as a man than I’ve ever had before.
We like to joke in our community about “bottoms” and how there’s some negative or inferior aspect that goes along with wanting to get fucked, but I think most of us know at heart that bottoms are equal in power and worth as any tops. In fact some would even say that the bottoms have all the power. As a boy I see myself as having tremendous worth–otherwise why would a Daddy even bother with me? When I’m with Daddy, I feel beautiful and lucky and eager to serve. Goes back to the words on my dog tags: “Trust, Honor, Respect. Serve, Obey, Protect”; the code of leathermen and the code of boys. We each have our place and together we flow and build one another up.
Being a boy also puts me in a prime position to benefit from the knowledge and experience of the elders* (*not the same as “old”) in the community. Daddy is a mentor who teaches about life, both within Leather and beyond. The history of our community is kept largely in the hearts and minds of our members and I feel the vast amount of learning that takes place is through oral traditions* (*I mean storytelling and sharing folks, not slobbery bjs 😉 ). Along with serving Sir, one of my roles is to ask and listen and learn to be a better man through Sir’s experiences. As someone still new to the community, I’ve found being a boy an ideal place to be to soak up all the knowledge and wisdom that men have to offer.
I think a big part of Leather is finding power in the identities we create. We’re able to break away from the normal rigors of society and be someone who feeds our desires and longings. When Daddy puts on my collar and snaps the lock, I know exactly who I am and what I’m supposed to do. I’m empowered and potent because I know my strength and I know I have Daddy standing right behind me, supporting me. There’s no place I’d rather be than by my Daddy’s side.