NYC-based fetish gear company SLICK IT UP has a new ad out that beautifully homo-augments a classic scene from the 80’s film Weird Science with a studly man that any blossoming gay boy would just die for. Check it–and all of their amusing commercials–out!
Captured Angel
Remember when I referenced a top secret video project going on at the Eagle? Well friends today is the BIG REVEAL.
Filmed entirely at the Eagle NYC, this is Q’s (aka MISS DOLLHEAD) epic music video showcasing his talents as a hair stylist and his flare for gender-bending styling. What you should know about Q: he’s awesome, he’s fierce (and not the kind you see on Bravo, he’s for real fierce), you can find him manning the ManSkins leather/gear shop at the Eagle, and he works at the lavish Bumble and bumble salon over on W 13th St.
What you should know about the video: our first taping turned out to be too HOT for Bumble and bumble, so we went back and toned it down a bit; Troy A. Riddle of Troy Alexander Photography is the man behind the camera and who worked hard in the editing room to give us this video; no models were hurt during the filming of this video despite the collars/leashes/high heels.
Is there street parking for my bike? And enough closet space for my boots?
Quick! Name one of the most arduous tasks in NYC. That’s right! Apartment hunting! And why is that? Because there are millions of bizarrely laid out apartments filled with all manner of citizens with at least a quirk or five and you’ll be paying insane sums of money to live in these places! YEAH! NYC!
I’ve been on the apartment hunt for over two weeks now and so far I’ve seen 8 places I do NOT want to live and crossed off several blocks in town that I never want to transverse again (on the plus side I have refined my searching methods and know where I want to live and what I’m looking for in a living situation…so it’s been a good learning experience). Here are a few of the choice encounters:
The first place I saw was in response to a Craigslist ad with a guy named Bruce. When I arrived at the apartment, I called Bruce and he said, “Oh you’re here! Great, I’ll send my son right down to let you in.” Son?? Turns out Bruce is the dad of a 19 year old boy named Matt who is the actual prospective roommate. Nineteen years old. After looking around the apartment Bruce took me aside, put his hand on my shoulder and said, “Of all the people who have come by today, you have the best energy. I’d love for you to be Matt’s roommate and friend.” NOPE! Nope nope nope. I’m not looking for a mentor situation here. Matt is a cute young man with a muscle boy body (he’s a wrestler and so innocent looking…ggrrrr) but I’m looking to share my space with an equal and not a boy. Next.
Then came Debbie on the UWS with a 3-bedroom where my bedroom could be a vampire’s tomb room: long and narrow, one tiny slit of a window that faces a dark alley, a mirror that shows no reflections…well, made that part up. The day I saw the apartment was also the day a giant leak had destroyed the ceiling in the bathroom and thus making it impossible to use the toilet without getting wet (in an un-fun way). Debbie was cool and a reader of A Song of Ice and Fire series, but I just didn’t feel like it was going to work out (also the living room and the kitchen were at opposite ends of the looong L-shaped apartment). Next!
Things only got better from there. My next appointment introduced me to a charming but strange little old woman who was renting out a massive house up in Harlem. There were 4-bedrooms/3-baths with 3 other housemates who were all < 24 years old. The house was pretty cool, messy, but had potential and there was a dog named George. George attacked the little old lady while we were viewing the house and tore her sweater. Then I thought I saw bedbugs. NEXT!
Finally there was Kyle who lives on a quiet street really close to a subway stop and next to a grocery store and laundry. The building is lovely from the outside and I was truly charmed by the area. I buzzed the apartment and waited with a hopeful smile. Kyle didn’t answer…some lady did and directed me to Kyle’s down on the ground floor. Ok, no worries…ground floor! The ad did say “garden apartment”. I finally find Kyle and he ushers me in to a…an…office…? YES! Kyle is living in a space that was previously used as commercial space! He’s even kept the reception desk in the “living room”. The “bedrooms” are windowless squares that use to be offices and there’s no kitchen! And no shower. And is this a joke? Seriously, Kyle, wtf? Kyle assures me he intends to install a shower and a kitchen in 3 days time. Whatever, let the tour continue…the coolest part of the apartment was the back yard that’s huge and lush and well maintained. And shared with the church next door who doesn’t allow alcohol in the yard. ACK! NEXT!!!!
So the search continues and I wonder if when I move I’ll still be able to get to the Eagle on Thursdays. Seriously, I’m opting to stay in the upper reaches of Manhattan instead of Brooklyn in part because that means getting home late from the Eagle is still doable (also the bf lives in Harlem). I also wonder what it will be like to wear gear around my new neighborhood. Living in the East Village no one really cares…but will the residents of Harlem feel the same? I have worn neoprene shorts and boots in Harlem and had a couple people laugh at me and one girl hollar a flattering remark about my booty, but in general I’m a bit nervous about gearing it up on streets above 110th. I predict future blog posts inspired by these explorations…
Back to Craigslist to find my future home. Be well pups and studs xx
Rick and me ready to go out!
Fire Island: a land of legend, an island of social history…somewhere between fag fantasy and summer paradise reality. Beautifully sculpted bodies supported by little more than speedos and sunglasses strut up and down the beach in a constant parade of lust and vanity accompanied by Gaga remixes that serve as an omnipresent soundtrack to the narrow wooden walkways that connect lavish houses to the beach, bay, and port. They say Fire Island is what you make it, and for the droves of gay men that giggle and woof around this scenic island it’s a place to relax, be free, and have a lot of summer fun.
Over the weekend I took a trip to the island with my leather brothers Rick and Peter who have a brand new gorgeous house in the Pines. This was actually my first in-season trip to Fire Island and after hearing all the stories, anecdotes, and even watching a documentary about the island, I was eager to explore it for myself. The weekend begins Friday evening when we arrive, settle in, and then turn our attention to going out. Tonight is the Underwear Party at the Pavilion where apparently lots of gay boys are shy to be in their underwear (despite the fact the swimsuits they wear all around town are as minimal as underwear). I look to Rick about what to wear and he says, “We’re going in gear”.
Twenty minutes later we’re teasing some queen on the walkway about ropes and cigars on our way to the party. The path is dark and only the occasional passing light reveals our boots, vests, and armbands. I opted for a jock, because, why not–it’s Fire Island and as we reach the downtown area Rick asks, “Are you ready, we’re about to go out into the light!”
The party is alright…there are lots of silly boys fully clothed inside and the music is the thud-thud-boom-boom kind. A quick look around the room and a leather armband on a stranger’s wrist catches my attention. We exchange smiles and suddenly I’m introduced to a gentleman from Amsterdam who’s also in the community. Love it when that happens…wear your gear and you’ll make new friends.
Underwear Party done, we then head to Sip and Twirl next door. As the 3 of us push through the crowd I see eyes turn and hear a few excited whispers of “leather men” and “in a jockstrap!” Surprisingly no one gropes or grabs me in the crowd…isn’t this Fire Island? The music here is much better and the crowd is friendly and once again being in gear attracts the attention of another leatherman who passes by and recognizes my vest. After a bit of growling and a few licks I’ve made a new friend and also managed to startle an old friend who’s never seen me in gear before (all he said was “Justin?” *turns me to stare at ass, laughs, stumbles away*). FRIDAY WIN.
Singlet half stripped
Flash forward to the next day, Saturday evening around 6pm when it’s time for Tea (there’s high tea and low tea…just the time/place the boys/men come to drink/socialize) and big brother Rick is ready to show me off again (seriously he’s always encouraging the men who stare by saying, “You like? You can touch it if you want”). For Tea I wear one of my FAVORITE things: my wrestling singlet (from Roman International Fight Gear). Love love love my singlet. It’s easy, it’s hot, it makes my ass and bulge look amazing! Men and women stare–something that of course gives me a thrill but also surprises me a bit. Hanging out at Tea is another fun time and I love the opportunity to wear my gear out somewhere new. I get a thumbs up from a go go boy, see old friends, make new ones, and Rick gets to say hello to one of his fav porn stars. Life on the island is pretty cool.
Sitting on the ferry on my way back to the mainland I’m exhausted and drift in and out of sleep with the waves. My formal introduction to Fire Island has been a success and I now understand all the excitement and enjoyment people get from vacationing there. One of my last interactions with someone on the island was Sunday afternoon when a man walking by did a double take and said, “Hey! You’re the singlet guy! I know you, I saw you at Tea.” In that moment I was wearing just regular clothes, but the fact he recognized me as “the singlet guy” brought a HUGE smile to my face. “Yeah, I’m the singlet guy,” I say coyly. “You should wear a singlet too next time.”
Until next time.
Roman in an X Gear singlet
Here’s another installment of my interview series with men in the Leather/kink/BDSM community. This edition features Roman Troy the mind and muscle behind X GEAR, the NYC-based fetish fight gear company for enthusiasts of MMA, Boxing, Wrestling and Marital Arts. A former MMA fighter himself, Roman is a man dedicated to providing gear to guys that is fun, hot, and dripping with masculinity. Roman lives here in NYC with his partner and pack of rescued pit bulls.
What are your hanky colors?
A better question might be which colors would I NOT flag because I would flag a lot of them. As much as I love yellow, I also love red and I need to have blue and sometimes I’m just in the mood for green. There are a lot of them, but I’d say all the basics are a basis for a good hearty diet—and I love to eat.
What’s your favorite piece of gear?
It’s hard to say, depends on what I’m doing, how I’m training…but if I have to pick one, it would be a jock. I live in a jock; I don’t think I even own a pair of underwear. I actually own a design patent on a style of jock that I’ll be making soon for Naked Kombat. Jocks are great and I love wearing them…doesn’t even have to necessarily be clean.
What is X Gear?
I originally started Roman International Fight Gear when I moved to NYC and we were selling competition quality gear to athletic clubs. My partner is the one who came up with the idea to try contacting some of the fetish companies to begin selling our gear to a different crowd. I knew there was an interest there, but I wasn’t sure if I was ready to take things in that direction. Then one day we went into the Leather Man down on Christopher Street and spoke to the manager there and it was the easiest sale I had made in years.
X Gear is not necessarily a product as it is a way of thinking. I look at the products and I relate to them in a very visceral way. We take gear made for competitive fighting and MMA and make it more tactile and stimulating so your response is a more sexual one.
The colors—red, yellow, blue, black—that are common flagging colors in the fetish community are also used in martial arts to denote rank. This weird parallel actually ended up working really well and people have responded well to the gear.
What are your thoughts and philosophies behind gear?
It’s not about the gear; it’s about the man who wears the gear. Ultimately anyone can put on a piece of anything, but it’s really about the thoughts and feelings behind the gear. I’m selling products that make men feel more masculine or sexual, but I’m more concerned with men being true to themselves and confident in who they are. It’s about being real and having self esteem and owning it. It’s who you think you are—who you believe you are. I want to help people to believe in themselves.
It’s about control, it’s about desire, it’s about submission, strength, will, and power. It’s about feeling what that is at the hands of a man who knows who he is and accepting what he is about to force you to become.
How does X Gear relate to more traditional Leather?
Men are attracted to masculinity and strength. The gear gives people a sense of self and a strong identity—whether that’s a tough wrestler or a fighter or whatever.
There is a big movement towards sports gear in the fetish community and I think it’s driven in part by young men who are looking for something new and fresh that gives them a sense of self. The new youth want something sexy and visually appealing and sports gear just happens to be what people want to explore right now. Interests change and I think the fetish scene will continue to morph and change as we go along. Who knows what will be popular in the future. Maybe it’ll be space gear? Everyone will want to be in space suits, who knows.
What advice would you give a young man exploring the scene?
The best advice I could give someone is to know yourself…just know yourself. That has gotten me far. And if you don’t know yourself, learn. Take every opportunity to learn.
Check out Roman’s X Gear online.
The Eagle Welcomes You
A bright and sunny Sunday morning is a weird time to be outside the Eagle. The sidewalk that’s usually shadowy with red tinted light is now blindingly bright in the sun. Big metal blast doors cover the Eagle’s entryways and the looming eagle emblem hanging on the building’s side seems quiet and asleep. The street is quiet and I want to be asleep. BUT, I’m here for something fun…a favor for a friend…and honestly my excitement for the project far outweighs any other desire to be sleeping or eating pancakes (things you do on a Sunday morning).
The project is–for now–top secret as my friend wants to keep it under wraps until he’s ready to reveal it (and then I’ll treat you all to a fun video)…but the experience of hanging out at the Eagle during the day in a very different context than the nighttime bar scene was great.
My connection to the Eagle has been growing over the past couple years and I’ve really come to see it as a friendly social space that houses a part of queer history. The building itself is a historical structure made up of ancient aching bricks that date back to the very early days of the City. With the lights on, you can really see the tough old stone of the floors and the walls covered in photographs of leathermen from the past (there’s actually tons of pictures, posters, and even some paintings all around the bar) . There’s a sense of history and lineage here…a small specialized force that I love exploring and getting to know.
With the recent blog entries about gentrification and the inevitable development of the area around the Eagle, there are many who believe the Eagle’s days are numbered (just like the other bars and clubs before it: The Lure, Spike, Anvil, Mineshaft, etc). I was sitting and having dinner with a friend the other night down in the trendy Meat Packing District and he was telling me stories of his adventures in the 80’s in the old leather places. Turns out the restaurant we were eating at was once one of those old places–now erased from the cityscape and turned into a pricey eatery. We discussed the value of having social spaces for our community and despite whatever criticism people have about the Eagle, it’s a great place for us.
So here I am, on a Sunday morning dressed up in gear at the Eagle (the owners are WONDERFUL for letting us use the space for our projects and endeavors). One of the other guys involved in the project isn’t a leatherman and he sits a bit tense and wide-eyed as he watches us put on gear. He asks me, “So…you really wear this stuff sometimes?” I smile and laugh and tell him, “Of course!” and give a little explanation about Leather. I invite him to CODE and he responds with a non-committal smile, still seeming unsure and nervous. “It’s really a nice place, man. Guys are very cool and welcoming,” I try to assure him.
The Eagle. It’s the only leather bar I’ve ever known and I do love it. And with great owners who are willing to let us use the space for our various events–fundraisers, parties, music videos, etc.–I say let’s enjoy this bar as much as we can. It’s there, go play!
Nighttime walk through the city
I stand on the subway platform in my boots and leather vest waiting in the heat for the next train headed west. Two hipster gays across the tracks stare and whisper something to each other as we all mutually check each other out. The train arrives shortly after with its roar and squeal and as I get on several heads turn look me and my gear up and down. It’s Thursday night and I’m on my way to the Eagle. This is the time to show people that Leathermen still walk the streets.
The little tradition I do every Thursday night is to head west to 8th Ave/14th street by subway and then walk north and west through Chelsea to 28th St between 10th and 11th Ave–the location of the Eagle. This route takes me through what I consider the gayest streets of NYC in Chelsea, past the cute and mundane bars and restaurants, past the nice apartment buildings where former hook ups live, past project housing and the city clinic, and finally into the (gradually changing) industrial area just beyond the bright center of things to the Eagle. This is a walk I almost always do alone and in gear and it has become a sort of sacred pre-CODE stroll.
The origins of my walk came from a time before Leather when I would go out alone to some bar in Chelsea and wait for it to get late enough to then proceed to the Eagle. This usually took place on a weekend when none of my friends then had an interest in going to the Eagle with me. The solitary stroll was a little thrilling as I passed by all the hot men in Chelsea and then headed deeper into the gloom of the west side and finally onto the remote 28th street.
Today, this route is bordered by the glowing High Line with its ambient lighting and charming couples smiling down, but the quiet introspective walk is still a valuable time for me to decompress after a long week and reflect on where I am in life. When you walk the same path every week you get to compare all those former selves and marvel at the changes in yourself…and also marvel even more at all the parts that remain so constant.
This walk is also a great time to show the queens that Leather’s heart is still pumping and moving. Cruising in Chelsea is rampant on any day, so I’ve come to see all those hungry eyes as an opportunity to showcase a part of gay culture that everyone is familiar with, but fewer and fewer people actually know. I’m a subtle ambassador for Leather walking past with a knowing smile and a glint of mischief in my eyes. I see the scanning eyes take me in, hear the occasional comment of “where you going tonight?”, and stride onward hoping to pull someone into my wake.
I love this walk. I love the sound of my boots on the sidewalk and the way wearing gear makes me walk with a more confident step. I love that I have a fun, friendly bar waiting for me at the end. I love who I’ve become over the years along this walk.
NYC Pride
I awoke last Saturday morning to a good-natured and joking proposal of marriage from my boyfriend. “Did we get the vote?” I mumbled as I blurred into wakefulness. Yes, we got the vote. Fags can marry in New York now.
GAY MARRIAGE! WOOHOO! Ok honestly the phrase “gay marriage” bugs me a little bit. It’s not gay marriage…it’s marriage…it’s marriage equality. And after years of campaigning and hoping we now finally have the recognition and support of the New York State government for our relationships. Six states down, forty-four to go. The tide is turning and with it I imagine a change in the way LGBT people think about themselves, their relationships, and their place in society.
Back when I was in college and on the verge of coming out, I thought that to be gay would mean to give up any hope of getting married and having a traditional family. Admitting to myself and the world that I was a homo meant giving up so much and plunging into a life I knew nothing about and was scared to death to embrace. Since then I’ve ventured along and found that queer life really isn’t that different and it’s been a continuously unfolding experience of discovery and growth. There have been rough spots over the years and having to fight for equality within my personal world as well as the larger societal context has tended to wear on my spirits a bit.
Living in a society that doesn’t validate me or my relationships has given me thick skin and taught me to turn inward for strength. At times I’ve subtly–or forcefully–rejected societal norms and expectations and I’ve developed a “fuck you!” reflex response to the ignorant haters who sneer at me when I hold hands walking down the street or lecture me with pseudo intellectualism about morality and natural design. I’ve come to define the quiet intimate moments with a lover as true and pure and as existing beyond society’s cruel grasp. My oppression and rejection have formed a type of rebellious strength that sparks bravery, honesty, and passion.
And on Saturday afternoon–Pride weekend–as I walked through the city I felt something completely new–a new level of acceptance. Maybe not fully accepted, not completely by the federal government or the religious powers in place…but today I am more of a citizen than I’ve ever been before. And having that validation by the authority of the state has power and makes me feel less like a rebel–less under pressure and more connected to society as a whole. I was surprised by this feeling.
So now I’m seeing friends–couples who’ve been together for years–get engaged and start prepping to be husband and husband officially. I sense such potential for a greater acceptance of queers by the fact that we are now recognized as legitiment lovers and partners and despite the fact it’s fun to feel a bit like a rebel, it’s also way cool to feel like a “normal”.
Now I’m not saying I’m in any rush to get married…I just like the fact that civil rights have won a victory and that queers are getting a little more respect and thus a little healthier psyche as a result. The road goes ever onward…
I was amazed at how many shirtless men were crammed into that single city block on the Sunday of Folsom Street East.
The kinky leather street festival that’s the little brother to the San Fran event, took place on Sunday afternoon along 28th street between 10th and 11th ave–the stretch of road that’s usually pretty quiet except for the people heading to the Eagle or Scores or one of the little art galleries. The mass of leather/kinky folks and enthusiasts and those curious to see them was a sea of beefy arms, hairy chests, tattoos, beards, harnesses and bare asses. I felt a constant vibration and hum of energy as my eyes skipped around all the men in gear.
This was my first Folsom East because last year I was not yet fully initiated into Leather and I was gradually wading out into the community that’s become my home. As I walked the street on Sunday with my group of leather boy friends and boyfriend, I was happy to see so many familiar faces in the crowd. I LOVE seeing so many guys out…I would love to see them at the Eagle on a Thursday…but seeing the crowds at Folsom just makes me feel like there’s vibrant and fun community flourishing despite some of the doom-and-gloom talk that goes on about “the dwindling leather community” (which always reminds me of Tolkien’s elves leaving Middle Earth).
Of course I do feel a tension in the air sometimes about the future. This year the Highline Park was opened and extended across 28th street so the hundreds (thousands?!) of non-leather people could look down at the mayhem of celebration and say things like, “oh my! those men are showing their arses!” Gentrification is coming to our little dark street. The other night on my way to the Eagle I saw straight couples with dogs and smiles exiting the Highline right there on 28th!
UPDATE: another point of tension about all this gentrification and threat to the Eagle–on Friday night, the 24th, just after the announcement of marriage equality in NY state and at the beginning of Pride weekend, 20 NYPD descended onto the Eagle for a “routine inspection” (raid) of the grounds. Coming a couple weeks after the opening of the trendy Highline Park I have to wonder if the pressure is mounting against our bar. Read more here.
Anyway, the successful turn out at FSE (biggest to date) juxtaposed by the gentrification crap lets me come to one conclusion: No matter what happens to the spaces, the people and the desires will still flourish…we’ll just possibly need new spaces…
Stephe and me at FSE (neoprene was sweaty)
Andy Tonken, Mid-Atlantic Leather boy 2011
A NYboL brother, regular at the Eagle, and 2011’s Mid-Atlantic Leather boy, Andy Tonken is the subject of this edition of Beneath the Black Guard–my interview series with members of the leather community. Andy grew up in D.C. and has been in NYC for four years now and was one of the first young men I was introduced to when I entered into the scene. Adorable and clever, dedicated and true, Andy is an inspiration to men and boys alike. I caught up with him one evening before CODE to get the story on this cutie pie leather boy.
What are your hanky colors?
Which side? (Give me both) Ok, on the right, hunter green, yellow, pale yellow, magenta—from time to time—and then on the left, yellow.
Do you have a favorite item of gear?
All of the gear that I have means something to me in a specific way and reminds me of either when I got it or the period of my life I was in when I got it…or how it makes me feel when I wear it. When I’m in my boots I feel like I’m on top of the world and they really give me a lot of confidence. I also love my vest that has my NYboL patch on it because it’s a mark of achievement for me to be accepted into NYboL. I love my chaps because they are the first piece of leather that I ever bought and my first pair of boots are special because I stole them from the theater department of my high school…every piece has a story.
What drew you to the leather community?
I had been intrigued and cautiously checking out the scene for a while. And then I met someone who became my first mentor in leather while on vacation with my mom…it was a great family vacation, let me tell you…and then I just started going out and getting to know people in the community and came out to myself as a leather boy and yeah, here I am.
What is NYboL?
The way I describe NYboL to folks who are unfamiliar with boys’ clubs is as a leather fraternity. NYboL stands for “New York boys of Leather” and we are one of a series of boys clubs that exists across the country and throughout the world. We’re a group of leather people who identify as boys and we work together to serve the community in order to share experiences and learn from each other, and also have fun. NYBboL in particular is a group of self-identified boys, so not all of us are biologically male and we have members of all ages—all over 18, of course.
Why did you run for the Mid-Atlantic Leather Boy title?
That’s a question I’ve been asked many times in the last few weeks and it’s one the judges asked me in the interview portion of the contest. The answer is, I didn’t need a title to be a leather boy, but having a title certainly facilitates the kind of service and outreach that I’m interested in doing. That includes fundraising and community activism as well as education and mentoring for the other leather boys out there. I want other boys to know that they have a place to feel confident in their identity and that you don’t have to fit a certain mold to be a leather boy. It’s important when you’re young and in the scene to have a place you can go to and get support from other boys. It’s great to learn from our elders, but there’s also something to be said for boys learning from other boys. If I had one wish for my year as a title holder it is to help mentor other boys in the community.
What was your experience at the Mid-Atlantic Leather boy Contest like?
The contest started and was over in a blink of an eye. Backstage everything is moving quickly and you have to take little mental snapshots of everything along the way or else you won’t remember anything.
The contest was really four contests in one including Mid Atlantic Leather boy, Leather Sir, Leather Woman, and Community Bootblack. I knew another contestant in another category, Morgaine running for Leather Woman, and it was really nice having that kind of relationship and support backstage. She was so helpful and sweet to me and reminded me of why we in the leather community do what it is we do.
Winning was really exciting…and shocking. And also terrifying…everything all at once. With a title comes responsibility and now that’s it’s sinking in I’m really excited and looking forward to the coming year.
Any words of wisdom to a young person entering into the community?
No matter who you are, be who you are…explore who you are, try new things and put yourself out there. Remember from whence the community has come, but also be genuine and bring what you have to offer to the community. Find the role and the place that fits you and go with it. Being yourself is a lot sexier than trying to be someone else.
Andy with current Mr. New Jersey Leather, Robert Vitale. Short on stature, big on heart.
To learn more about Andy, you can find him at the Eagle on Thursdays at CODE.
Scruff and the City 